Sex Gets Real 83: Newbie sex, swinger sex, & demo sex

Newbie sex, swinger sex, and demo sex.

Dylan is back from Hawaii. Basically, it was really hot and there was boob sweat.

Dawn attended Sex Down South where she saw a hand sex demo, did a masturbation circle, and generally had an amazing time learning from Tristan Taormino and Amy Jo Goddard.

Plus, we have so many listener emails – a sex newbie wants to know if she should carry condoms. A swinger reports back on her latest adventures. Peoria Illinois apparently had a rad Pride. And what if your boyfriend ONLY wants to do reverse cowgirl anymore?

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Episode breakdown

  • 1:02 – Dammit, Dawn. Don’t watch porn on your laptop in the bathtub.
  • 2:10 – Shit happens. Unless you’re on pain meds and then there’s no shit. Literally.
  • 3:04 – Sex Down South in Atlanta was amazing.
  • 3:34 – Dawn went to her first masturbation circle at the conference.
  • 4:40 – There was a no walking around rule, so they had a lube fairy to help get people anything they might need during the masturbation.
  • 6:32 – It was all yummy sounds and moans. Very arousing.
  • 7:22 – Amy Jo Goddard did a Hand Sex class with live demos. We need more live demo sex education.
  • 8:36 – Dawn went to Anal Sex 101 with Tristan Taormino, as well as her Making Open Relationships Work session.
  • 9:03 – Did you know that Fleet enemas have a laxative in the fluid solution? Not ideal right before sex. Tristan recommends pouring out that liquid and filling it with warm water before you put it up your butt.
  • 13:31 – No where in our lives do we see people navigating real sex – the communication, the negotiation, the on-going dialog, the checking in. This is why we need more live demos for sex education. It’s critical, and Dawn wants to start doing them.
  • 16:16 – Why do people think it’s sexy to be super hot and sweaty? Just no.
  • 18:15 – Dawn had the sex in Canada – pegging, face fucking, bending over all the things. It was fun.
  • 19:11 – Thank god for the internal/female condom or massages would never happen.
  • 20:31 – Apparently there was a really violent pegging scene in the new season of American Horror Story? We don’t like that.
  • 22:44 – In her Anal Sex 101 session, Tristan said you can sneak candy into the movies, but you shouldn’t sneak anything into anyone’s body. Consent.
  • 23:53 – Our listener David wrote in with his sexual super power, but after thinking about it, Dawn isn’t sure it’s that great.
  • 27:36 – Kristin needs help. Her boyfriend only wants to have sex in reverse cowgirl anymore. What should she do?
  • 28:59 – Sometimes Dylan just wants to be helium-heels.
  • 29:13 – Often the best way to tell someone something is already in the email listeners send us. And fuck that if he’s making you do all the work.
  • 30:15 – It’s not about using sex as punishment, it’s about getting to have the kind of sex you want and if your sex partner isn’t willing to meet your needs, then you don’t have to have the sex.
  • 31:10 – Dawn and Alex used an njoy butt plug during sex and it was AMAZING.
  • 33:31 – We love hearing that Peoria Illinois’ pride was so sex positive. Handing out internal condoms and everything!
  • 34:40 – You can buy internal condoms in bulk from Amazon – like 1,000. Dylan is worried about dry rot.
  • 35:28 – A listener just started having sex. She is wondering if women should carry condoms or if that’s weird?
  • 36:55 – Dawn recommends carrying a safer sex kit: external condoms, internal condoms, latex free gloves, and mini packets of lube. All of that would fit in a small envelope, so there’s no excuse.
  • 39:00 – Every single person has a right to decide for themselves what level of risk they’re taking on. As a result, if you do acquire an STI, you MUST disclose it to your partners. That is non-negotiable.
  • 40:20 – What if some hottie wants to finger you? Pull out your super sexy black nitrile glove from your sex kit and go to town. YUM.
  • 41:37 – If you sleep with cis dudes, you are going to constantly run across guys who have a zillion reasons why they don’t have a condom or why they don’t like them. Too damn bad.
  • 43:30 – Listener Whitney wrote in with an update about her swinging partners. Yay adventures.
  • 44:41 – When a relationship is in turmoil, it’s amazing when other sexual partners respect that and step back, like Whitney and her husband did for their friend.
  • 46:18 – Respecting your sexual partners builds trust and safety, which allows for more risk taking and nastiness when you are in the bedroom.
  • 46:41 – Dawn is dying to try this rope technique she learned from Frozen Meursault that a listener has now tried.
  • 49:50 – Dylan was so exhausted on her vacation she couldn’t even masturbate.
  • 51:12 – Yay boob sweat.

And be sure to pin, share, and Instagram this bad boy

On this week's episode of Sex Gets Real, Dawn and Dylan answer tons of questions from newbie sex and condoms to talking to your boyfriend about new positions to swingers navigating the complexities of relationships. Plus, Dawn went to Sex Down South and reports back on the shenanigans.