We learn what a soggy waffle is, discuss sex toy vending machines, and rage on Tinder.

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We have two listener stories – one about a soggy waffle which sends Dylan running to throw up and another that leads to a lengthy discussion on cream pies.

Then, we talk about Twitter potentially removing all porn stars and porn companies from it’s site (which would really suck) and the first sex toy vending machine in the U.S. is about to hit the market.

There’s also a long discussion on the dickonomics of Tinder. Basically, don’t lower your standards because hookups are abundant and easy to find.

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Episode breakdown

• 1:25 – It’s almost gay pride weekend in DC. Yay.
• 2:41 – Dawn is going to gross you the fuck out.
• 3:11 – Please have a trashcan nearby. Dylan is pre-gagging.
• 3:30 – Do you know what the waffle game is? Well, now you do.
• 5:13 – Their high school games were way more advanced than our high school games.
• 6:10 – Who likes to eat cum? Not Dylan.
• 6:28 – That rolling it around in your mouth thing in porn is not appetizing at all.
• 8:03 – Robbie the Love Robot wrote to us with his idea for making porn using real couples who want to try threesomes and group sex for the first time.
• 9:08 – Yay Robbie for knowing the importance of fluid bonding and birth control.
• 9:42 – Dylan doesn’t mind cream pies. Dawn is on the fence.
• 11:10 – Dawn enjoys seeing condoms in porn, but Dylan does not. Our differences continue as we dive deeper.
• 12:08 – How do you watch porn? Dawn puts herself in the scene. Dylan does not.
• 13:21 – Dylan likes the forbidden factor of bare backing.
• 15:25 – When Dawn makes porn, it will always be safer sex practices and in a hot way.
• 16:14 – The city of Vienna changed some of their pedestrian crosswalk symbols to same sex couples to help raise awareness and improve safety. Check them out on USA Today.
• 19:02 – Twitter may be purging all of their users who post porn. It’s called the Great Porn Purge of 2015. We do NOT approve, Twitter.
• 20:45 – What the fuck, Mark Zuckerberg? Hating on sex education and sex stuff like our podcast.
• 22:47 – If Twitter bans porn, Dylan thinks a new social media company should be started called Twatter.
• 25:00 – This could hurt sex workers in a big way if Twitter follows through with this.
• 25:26 – The U.S. is so backwards compared to the rest of the world when it comes to sex and sex education.
• 25:59 – Pink Box Vending – vending machines with sex toys! We need these to launch ASAP.
• 26:30 – What would we want in a sex vending machine? Latex gloves, male condoms, female condoms, cock rings, little vibrators, maybe blindfolds…
• 27:40 – Lesbians fisting each other in the bar bathroom. That’s right.
• 28:55 – Dylan is voting for butt plugs in the vending machine so she could throw that up in her date’s bum and then slap their ass on the dance floor.
• 30:00 – Listeners, if you walk up to a sex vending machine in a club, what would you want to see inside?
• 31:44 – Online dating – it’s a thing. Dylan dated one Asian girl who she happened to meet online.
• 35:26 – A new article on Medium.com about the dickonomics of Tinder and how the playing field is finally getting a little more equal got us all riled up.
• 36:05 – Dick is abundant and low value.
• 37:28 – Honestly, having high standards and going for people who respect you is not a guy thing, it’s an any gender thing. This writer just happens to make it super funny in a heteronormative way.
• 38:24 – Are the tides changing? Is Tinder becoming a legitimate option for finding decent dates and friends with benefits?
• 39:25 – Bless their blue-balled little hearts – we love this Medium.com author. Cracking up.
• 40:11 – One of the BEST things about Tinder is people can only message you if you match up with them and you can unmatch someone if they’re not a good fit. None of these random time wasters like on OK Cupid or Match.
• 43:32 – Forgive Dawn’s heteronormativity during this Tinder discussion.
• 44:33 – The guys who actually talk to their matches like human beings are way more likely to get what they’re after in the long run.
• 48:11 – Be truthful in your profile, too. Cuz lying is just a waste of time and energy for all involved.
• 48:47 – Camping. Dawn is not happy about her summer plans. At all.

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