All the ways NOT to break up with someone.

If you’re in the DC area, join Dawn for her relationship communication bootcamp on June 11th. Check it out here. You can also subscribe to the meetup to get all announcements. See you there!

A new service in Australia, called Sorry It’s Over, will break up for you for $5. If you pay a little more, they’ll add in features like a box of tissues or even a person to deliver the news face to face. Worst thing EVER, but still funny.

Which leads us into our breakup stories. Dawn did it pretty badly in high school, but Dylan’s epic drama (including something on Valentine’s Day) is unbeatable.

Or is it? Share your stories with us. We’re sure you’ve got some great ones.

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Episode breakdown

• 0:50 – We are doing a naughtiness test. Get a pen and paper, and let’s see where you land.
• 3:15 – Dylan got $150, Dawn got $90.
• 5:00 – Dawn is creating a sex test the next time we record, so stay tuned.
• 5:38 – Dylan calls herself a prude. Um….. No.
• 6:11 – The Daily Dot has an article on a service in Australia that will break up for you. Horrible and hilarious.
• 7:03 – Their sample break-up email would piss Dawn off, but it could be worse.
• 8:05 – Dylan’s version is much better. “John, you’re a dick.”
• 8:45 – Let’s talk about our break ups. Dylan ditches you and then shows up at the club with a new girl the next week.
• 10:58 – Dylan also likes to pawn exes onto her friends to get rid of them. It’s like a big list of what NOT to do.
• 11:43 – The worst break up is when you cheat.
• 12:00 – Dawn got cheated on by the guy she lost her virginity to.
• 12:50 – And Dawn also broke up with someone in high school in the worst way possible.
• 14:11 – That mentality of thinking if you reach a snag that it must be over is usually based in insecurity or distrust (or inexperience).
• 15:48 – That thing when you just aren’t nice to each other anymore.
• 16:49 – The WORST thing you can do is open a relationship when the relationship is in crisis. No good at all.
• 17:02 – Really dramatic breakups are toxic and so unnecessary. But they do make for great stories!
• 17:15 – Dylan – “Oh no. I’ve had shit thrown out on the fucking lawn.”
• 19:04 – And immediately follows that by getting broken up with on Valentine’s Day. Go Dylan.
• 20:00 – Lesbians. So much drama.
• 20:36 – Dawn did get her heart broken recently, and that was hard. But it was mutual and expected.
• 21:18 – Dawn and Dylan come up with a new business idea: Fuck You, It’s Over. Ta da!

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