tl;dr Abuse in polyamory. Can squirting cause incontinence? Are there men who don’t like sex? How to have sex with someone with large breasts?

Patrons who support at $3 and above, there’s a new bonus at patreon.com/sgrpodcast. It’s a listener question about first time sex, birth control, and deep throating. Tune in to hear it and thanks for supporting the show financially.

This week’s episode is you and me and your emails. Before we get to that, a few announcements.

First, I am in two new books. You can find an essay I wrote almost 2 years ago in the recently released “Sex Positive Now” anthology and I have been turned into a comic character for Meg-John Barker’s soon to be released “Gender: A Graphic Guide”. Pre-order yours today!

This week, I am also bringing our attention to two articles about abuse in polyamory that I think offer important questions for us all to hold. The first is Inês Rôlo’s “I was in a polyamorous and abusive relationship for 7 years… here’s what I learned” which was followed by Eve Rickert’s “What I Got Wrong in More Than Two: The Dark Night of the Soul.”

We need to hold ourselves and each other accountable for the ways we are doing relationship, and unfortunately much of the mainstream polyamory/non-monogamy advice just doesn’t hold the nuance that’s needed for people who have trauma, who experience mental illness, and a whole host of other realities.

On to your questions!

First up, Cathryn wrote in with some really sweet messages about discovering the podcast.

Next, Sofia wrote in about squirting and incontinence. Can squirting lead to incontinence? I got input from several pelvic floor therapists, and though the answer is more complicated, the overall sense is yes, it can. We explore why in the episode.

Then, Jose asks, “Am I the only guy who doesn’t like sex?” But the thing is, Jose has a thriving sex life – with himself. It’s partnered sex he doesn’t care for, so we explore asexuality, masculinity myths, and why it’s perfectly normal and OK to prefer sex with yourself.

Finally, Breast Distress has a new partner who has large breasts. How can she become a better at sex with someone who has large breasts, especially when it’s something she’s never done before? In addition to what I share, I also recommend Allison Moon’s piece in Bustle from a few years ago about sexy breast play.

Also, huge thanks to Hemlock for their awesome song “Firelight” which was used in this episode between questions. I’m digging it!

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About Dawn Serra:

What if everything you’ve been taught about relationships, about your body, about sex is wrong? My name is Dawn Serra and I dare to ask scary questions that might lead us all towards a deeper, more connected experience of our lives. In addition to being the host of the weekly podcast, Sex Gets Real, the creator of the online conference Explore More, I also work one-on-one with clients who are feeling stuck, confused, or disappointed with the ways they experience desire, love, and confidence. It’s not all work, though. In my spare time, you can find me adventuring with my husband, cuddling my cats as I read a YA novel, or obsessing over MasterChef Australia.

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Episode Transcript

Coming soon!